Voir Dire, Day 5, 10/18/10

Today was the final day of the Voir Dire process. The potential jurors who have not been eliminated for cause will return on Wednesday (10/20) and the final seating of the jury will take place. Opening remarks should start the next day.

My blog has been mentioned several times in recent days as a matter of concern. So, let me say this quite clearly: If you are a juror or potential juror on this case, you are not supposed to be here. Shoo! The judge told you specifically that you are not to seek out any information on the internet. Read anything you like when the trial is over. Until then, go away before you get us all in trouble or cause a mistrial or something. Scram.

As far as the content of this blog is concerned, it is just an expression of the journey that I am going through and is mainly about my own feelings and struggle. No one is going to find any juicy tidbits about the case or the trial here. Frankly, I probably don’t know anything more about the evidence than you do. All I know is how it all feels as I go through the experience. I wanted to share that in the hope that while it brought me a little healing to talk about it, it might also help the next family who is treading that same path. I have never written anything about the case that hasn’t already been reported in open court (which is where I heard it), and I’m not an expert in anything except what it feels like to be the mother and grandmother of murder victims. And the seats in the courtroom… I know a lot about how uncomfortable the seats are in the courtroom.

I have never had any doubt that the officers of the court: from judge, deputy District Attorneys and defense attorneys down to the clerk, bailiff and court reporter, are doing their best. They each have an important role to play in the process and I respect that. I’m not intending to pour invective on anyone’s head here. I’m not going to pretend that I’m not upset by things that happen or are said in court. I’m a grieving parent/grandparent, and in a very vulnerable place. Little irritations can feel big when you are holding yourself together by a thread. That’s just the way it is. That’s why I have a notebook in court: I sometimes heap all kinds of invective all over the place in my notebook. It can be very theraputic and stops me from throwing things and becoming a nuisance. But that is between me and the notebook and it has promised not to tell tales.


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