Losing "Everything"

On the way home from a Parents of Murdered Children meeting I was listening to NPR radio and heard a program about “losing everything.”  People were asked to talk about their experiences of loss – from a fire, investing with Madoff, Hurricane Katrina, the stock market, etc.  They talked about the grieving process.  They said that it was as if their life had ended.  They talked about many feelings that to me didn’t go with the kind of loss they had experienced.

How can you talk about losing “everything” if your family is still intact?  I had just spent a couple of hours with people who, like me, had experienced the ultimate loss of a homicide.  I would give anything to have lost everything else if I still had my three beautiful boys.  I lost a lot of the things they were talking about as well, my health, my emotional stability, my sense of self, my job of 25 years, my health insurance, etc.  Those things mean nothing at all when measured against the irreplaceable loss of my son and grandchildren.  I wanted to yell at them, but it was a taped program.  So I’m complaining about it to you instead!

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